A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.

She replied in a huff, “I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you.”

One day a boy and his father were at the dining room table working on the boy’s Social Studies homework.

They were focusing on the chapter about government.

The boy turned to his father and asked, “Dad, how many people work in the U.S. government?”

The father replied, without hesitating, “Oh, about half of them.”